Tag Archives: retirement

Retirement In A Can

30 Nov

I’ve noticed a disturbing trend with my aging parents, the increasing presence of canned food in their house. It seems like every time I visit them their shelves have become more crowded with canned food. Not just one pantry shelf or even one pantry but its taken over what used to be the linen closet and bedroom. Open a bedroom closet and you are sure to find row upon row of canned beans or vegetables instead of shoes and coats.

A number of years ago they first introduced me to canned chicken, I had no idea. Apparently you can buy it in bulk at Costco. A year ago it was the canned beef, grass fed and from Argentina no less. Then, over Thanksgiving weekend I came across what my Dad assured me was the holy grail of canned food, behold:

And how much might a can of bacon cost you must surely be asking yourself?

It’s only 9 0unces and costs more than the best rib eye money can buy. No wonder my Dad was more than a little protective of it as he kept asking me what I did with his bacon and begged me not to open it.

I should be nervous for my parents and my own future retirement but alas, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. I happen to love canned fish.

I did have one last question for my folks before jetting off, “where can I get my hands on some canned bacon?”

Without batting an eye my Dad said, “oh, at the violin, paintball and food storage store.”