Sprintervals

2 Apr

= Vomit. I’d never heard of a sprinterval let alone done one until today. They are just what they sound like. Do a few 20 second sprints followed immediately by a 5 min interval. Repeat the whole process a few times but not before taking a break to sit in the gutter on the side of the road with your head between your knees trying as hard as you can to not vomit.

I think most people would just vomit and get it over with. I know people that can vomit on the fly without even missing a pedal stroke (dug). Not me. To yield to the vomit is to unleash a beast that knows no propriety.

I convulse, I wretch and gag and flail about. I can’t think of a single worse thing for my body to do than vomit. Just ask Tasha. When I vomit she has to put the kids in the car and get as far away from the house as possible. I’m very noisy and very messy. I couldn’t imagine what a passerby would think if I let the beast out on the side of the road.

I can control it it just takes a little time. After about 10 minutes I was able to get back on my bike.

I doubt I’ll be doing any sprintervals anytime soon, I can’t believe I did more than one, but I would like to recommend everyone go out and do some tomorrow.

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10 Responses to “Sprintervals”

  1. KanyonKris April 3, 2008 at 9:21 am #

    Sounds fun. I take it you were joking when you recommended people do them.

    From the last post I took you to be the guy who rejects the flood of training fads in favor of just riding. So why do sprintervals? Are you really that bored? 😉

  2. dug April 3, 2008 at 10:18 am #

    i should do them. sounds like weight control to me.

  3. botchedexperiment April 3, 2008 at 1:54 pm #

    Dude, I challenge you to a puke-off. I’ve never even heard of someone that can rival me.

  4. KanyonKris April 3, 2008 at 2:50 pm #

    Who you gunna get to judge this “contest”?

  5. Adam April 3, 2008 at 3:40 pm #

    Here how it will go down:

    -Each contestant will eat a $6 burger from Car’s Jr.. They can choose any variety they want.

    -Each contestant will drink 32oz of Cola with the burger.

    -Each contestant will then wait 15 minutes.

    -After the 15 minutes is up, each challenger will do Sprintervals until puking commences.

    -The winner will be determined based on the following criteria:

    Overall violence of the vomit. (body movement, cussing, decibal level…etc)
    Number of blood vessels popped
    Distance of vomit from body
    Tears will earn bonus points

    -Winner will receive a free dinner at Carl’s Jr.

  6. brkeyes7 April 3, 2008 at 6:05 pm #

    You don’t understand. I don’t want to vomit ever again as long as I live. I’d rather go to the symphony or watch baseball even. I would do whatever it takes to never vomit again. But, if I were to compete in a vomit-off I would win hands down. I think dug remembers seeing me on all fours in the middle of a snowstorm blowing chili beans out of my nose. There is nothing like it. Kenny was witness to it after the Brianhead 100 one year. It aint pretty. Poor Tasha has been subjected to it and will testify that there is nothing like it.

  7. Bob April 3, 2008 at 6:25 pm #

    i am formulating a new race strategy, hmmm, may try it out in Hurricane.

    I am sure Kenny and others may help me.

  8. Rick S. April 4, 2008 at 8:14 am #

    I feel this way whenever I climb Tibble Fork. I still can’t shake the image of Dug feeding Maise cut up raw hot dogs at the top of that somabitch climb.

  9. botchedexperiment April 4, 2008 at 8:20 am #

    I once tore part of one my abdominal muscles while puking and couldn’t stand up straight for a week.

    In 1989 I was visiting San Francisco and I ate some bad sourdough and some rancid RicaRoni. I really had a big upchuck session. Imagine my surprise when later I heard there was some tectonic disturbance caused by my vomiting.

    I kind of felt bad, but such is the magnitude of my reverse parastalsis.

  10. wunnspeed April 7, 2008 at 12:00 pm #

    I break blood vessels in my face. I think I might have better aim though. Weißbiers will do it to me after enough of them. Then, I get the pleasure of 12 straight hours of nothing but retching. Can’t drink water, eat bread… nuttin’ Sucks dude!

    Gotta try Sprintervals…your way.

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